Autumn makes me feel happy—like I’m floating on sunshine and golden leaves—until, suddenly, it makes me feel a bit sad.😢
There is a question when you take an Enneagram test (here’s the post where I discovered my number) that asks whether you like feeling bittersweet. It took me a moment to answer, mostly because it was a question I didn’t expect in such a test, but once I settled on my answer I knew it was true for me: no. No, I do not like the feeling of bittersweetness.
I love the taste. I love coffee (espresso, actually). I don’t love feeling bitter and sweet, all at once.
And this is the feeling that I get in autumn. That this glorious season is about to come to an end. It’s already a short one in the Rockies and with the strong winds that we’re getting, I can actually hear the leaves hitting the pavement as they get whipped and whirled to the ground. They signify the beginning of a season that isn’t my favourite, especially not while I still have a young child that I need to wrestle into a snowsuit.
It’s also the feeling I get saying goodbye to loved ones who are visiting, watching my kids grow up, or finishing a project that has been such a joy to work on. But if there’s a lesson in all this, it’s to take the bittersweet as a reminder that all things pass. That I need to enjoy this day, this moment, this person, because tomorrow it may be gone, or different, or dead.
Yes, I went there. I went to that place our society doesn’t like to go to. I read another newsletter where the author wrote: “Great news! You’re going to die one day!” I thought this was both funny and sobering. Other cultures, from what I’ve witnessed, have a much healthier relationship with death. They embrace the seasons, the cycles. They respect their elderly. They think death is beautiful. In some countries, they stare death in the face every single day. I have friends who have come close to death and they live their lives as if they could end tomorrow. Others have witnessed a loved one pass, or barely survive, and they, too, seem to live with that intimate knowledge, like a sidekick through their day.
Most of us know this but we don’t live it.
I don’t know if I can flip a switch and be more mindful about this. But I’d like to be better at embracing bittersweetness. Of feeling the full force of it. Of swallowing it whole like a nice big cup of coffee.
Thanks to Ross C. for replying to my last installment of Field Notes. 📒 I’ve sent him a copy of Jim Davidson’s book, The Next Everest! Stay tuned for future giveaways.
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I submitted my manuscript!
Yes, this deserves its own section this time… I recently shared it on Instagram (see below), but here’s the text!
“I JUST HIT SEND on my manuscript. ✨ My hands are shaking as I type this… as I realize that my first keystrokes of LIGHTS TO GUIDE ME HOME were written on a beach on Motu Tiapaa in French Polynesia, way back in April 2014. And now it’s in the hands of the talented and creative folks at Rocky Mountain Books. There is still work to be done, but this is an enormous milestone for me. Thanks so much for your support thus far!
Thanks as well to the lovely Alexis McKeown for her fine touch with my author headshots.💚”
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What’s caught my attention lately… ✨
Take Me Outside: I have just finished reading Colin Harris’ book about his run across Canada as an effort to raise awareness in schools for children to get off their screens and spend more time outdoors. It’s something I’d like to dedicate more time to, as well. I could be spending more time outside. It’s an enjoyable read from an inspiring person.
Behold, I Have Returned From a Hike: One of the funniest things I’ve read on the web in a long time (and very, very true…). “Fear not. I have returned intact—with several dozen selfies and the unwarranted belief that if you didn’t walk around in the woods yesterday your life is worthless.” 😂
Check these out too… 🙌
Mailing List - Memoir - Join my list to find out more about the travelogue/memoir coming out Fall 2022.
The Wonders That I Find - My children’s book is now available! 🌿
My Email Newsletter - Yes, different from Substack. This newsletter is for specific updates about my books and various projects.
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